The wrong way, the right way, and…

If you’re reading the title of this blog, you’re probably freaking out.  Those of you who had the pleasure of knowing me ex-girlfriend would not be happy if she were to return.  Those of you who don’t know her, I think you should be, at some point, thanking God for your blessed life.  Ok, she’s not that bad, but she’s not someone who I want to associate with on a regular basis anymore.  Don’t worry though, she’s not back. Well, at least not in a physical form.

Last night I had one disturbing dream.  Let me present it to you in dream form:

So, as much as I remember in my dream, I’m at a dinner party with some ladies (of course), and I believe at one point I’m making out with one of them. Anyway, in walks my ex.  It was weird, but she seemed cool with the fact I was totally making out with the other girl.  Next thing I know, I’m having a shower (maybe I felt dirty after the making out), and I get out and she’s there.  She begins to tell me how she is pissed off that I went back to being friends with Ashley and Megen and all of these other people and how she knows that I’ve been going to “adult” places.  I tell her it’s not her business what I’ve been doing and with whom.  She is starting to get angry and is following me around as I’m packing clothes. I tell her that she didn’t even wait a month after I left to start boning (yes, I used the word boning) some other dude.  She is embarassed, but she is still up in my face, pushing me and being agressive, so I slap her.  I feel terrible admitting this part, but I smack her right across her face. 

This is not the first dream I’ve had where I’ve been in an awkward situation with her.  Actually, it’s not the first I’ve had about any of my exes.  I have had dreams about all of them, and still continue to have them now. I even have them about the very first girl I ever dated. What do you think that says about me? Do I have trouble letting go of the past? Should I stop eating before bed?

I guess this sort of wraps up my feelings about my most recent ex.  She was overbearing, controlling and had the worst communication skills.  Don’t misunderstand me, I have my fair share of character flaws. One that comes to mind is I’m way too nice.  Yes, that’s a flaw people!  I just have learned from the four years I spent with her what I do NOT want in a relationship.  Here they are in, in no sequential order:

• I do not want someone who is trying to change me. You know the people I’m talking about.  They look at guys like they are little projects.  They think to themselves “Sure, I hate these things about him, but if I can get him to love me then I can change all of those undesirable things like they he’s an old house”.  I will also point out that there are guys like this as well.  Not as many though. HA!
• I don’t want a woman who does not communicate her emotions or feelings. I can not stand it when anyone bottles up and decides to just stay quiet when something bothers them.  I’m not saying they need to share all of their deepest, innermost feelings (probably don’t want to hear those anyway), but when something annoys them or makes them upset, they need to talk. You have a mouth, use it.
• I don’t want someone who thinks that the rules only apply to me.  A relationship is a two way road, and therefore what goes for me, goes for you as well.  For instance, if I have to eat food you like, then you have to eat chili cheese coneys. YEAH
• She has to either love my friends, or be fine with the fact that I’m going to be spending time with them.  I will do everything I can to enjoy her friends, so I expect nothing less from her.   I have given up way too many friends in the past and will NEVER do it again. I think it’s pathetic when someone (I’m including myself in here) ostracizes themselves from their friends when they are in a relationship.  Why does it need to change?  It doesn’t.  I don’t need to spend ALL of my free time with my significant other. Believe me, she would get real tired of me if I did.
• I do not want someone who is only going to want me for my body….